Yes, I’ve Changed.

Everybody changes. You learn, you grow, you experience new things.

Everything you encounter has some sort of effect on you. It’s just how life is. 

For the most part, these changes happen subtly over the course of a few years. Slow enough that you barely even notice.

But this past year, I’ve changed the most. So much to the point that the phrase “You’ve changed”, has been used towards me. Which, I never know whether or not to take that positively or negatively.

This past year has tested my limits, made me soar, and sent me crashing to the ground. I cried more, laughed more, and spent a lot of days in confusion.

My heart got broken. I lost friends. And I learned that sometimes those “that’ll never happen to me” situations, may actually happen to you.

I also realized that I have the most incredible friends and family, who have taught and inspired me more than I could have possibly imagined. They make sure I don’t take life too seriously, but push me to work hard every day. They are there for every ab hurting laugh and every heartbreaking cry.

I had to figure out how to let people in, while also stitching up my wounds on my own. It wasn’t easy and I spent time questioning every move I made. But I don’t regret a thing. I can’t. 

I’ve learned too much and experienced too many important things, to look back and say, “I really wish I could take that back”.

Am I proud of my decisions? No. Did I say and do things I probably shouldn’t have? Yes. Don’t we all. But that’s what helped me grow.

And it was all worth it.

Who I am now isn’t afraid to make mistakes, as long as I learn from them. I thought I was strong then, but I’m even stronger now. I know how to listen to my heart without completely ignoring my mind.

I’ve learned how to let things go and not bottle up all of my emotions. To be open to new experiences and people, and make those around me feel appreciated.

With every loss, I’ve gained something new. I’m still so young. I haven’t figured it all out. I’m still going to make stupid mistakes. And life is still going to test my limits.

And that’s okay. 

So yes, I have changed. And quite frankly, I am proud of this change.

I am on a journey to be the best version of me possible. Whoever that may be. Only the future knows.

Xo

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‘WISH’ App Clothing Try-On..

So for awhile now I have been seeing the ‘WISH’ app ads pop up ALL over my Facebook feed, showcasing the CUTEST clothes ever. BUT, I was so skeptical, thinking okay the quality of these clothes has to be horrible because prices are so cheap. We are talking $4 cheap.

I decided that I needed to try it for myself and do a little trial and error for you guys.

Here’s the lowdown…

QUALITY:

To be honest, I was so expecting the quality to be a lot worse than it ended up being! It honestly is not bad considering what you are paying for it. You can’t expect Nordstrom quality (obvi) but definitely in comparison to something you would purchase at Forever 21. I honestly can’t complain much about the quality, I am very satisfied with it for what I paid.

SIZING:

Sizes run fairly small. I ordered up a size on each item and they ended up fitting perfectly. So if you plan on ordering anything, order up a size of what you would normally wear! I usually wear size small, so I ordered medium in everything and it was the perfect fit.

PRICE:

Affordable to the max. Right up this college girl’s alley. Almost too good to be true. Below each piece I have listed the price of everything I purchased. My grand total ended up being: $47.00, that’s shipping costs + tax. Mind Blown.

SHIPPING:

Since it is coming from China, you do have to wait around 2 weeks to get everything. Costs for shipping is only around $2-$4 and you are able to track your package which for me is crucial. I am like a little kid in a candy store when I am waiting for my packages to arrive.

WOULD I PURCHASE AGAIN?

YES! You could say I am ‘Wish’ obsessed. It is a little dangerous because everything is so cheap that I just end up spending hours and hours picking out clothes and think I am spending no money. Until I can afford high quality clothing, this will do when I am in a niche for some new, cute clothes.

Below are the pieces I got & cost of each item:

~The Cutest Pants Ever~

I really hit the jackpot with these. SO cute for everyday + work. I am going to be purchasing them in every color, most likely…oops.

Cost: $4.25

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~Striped Shirt~

This “shirt” was supposed to be an off the shoulder dress…but that definitely was not the case. Way too short to be a dress/ way too tight to wear off the shoulder. But it does make for a cute, casual shirt! I also am OBSESSED with the back detail.

Cost: $6.40

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~White Shirt~

I need a beach day in this shirt! How cute would this look in a cute beach town. I absolutely love it.

Cost: $5.00 

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~Stripe & Lace Dress~

For some reason this dress just gives me old 50’s vibes and I love it. I think it would be so cute to wear wine tasting or just around the city on a nice, summer day!

Cost: $6.40

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~White Romper~

Another piece I would love to have a beach day in! I think it is so cute and perfect for a day at the beach. Can you tell I really want to go to the beach?

Cost: $7.70

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~Denim Dress~

I love this denim dress for an every day look. Such a good staple to have in your closet for the summer time!

Cost: $4.75

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Happy shopping! XO 

Wannabe Wine Tasting Outfit

Does this outfit not just SCREAM Wine Tasting?!

Plot twist: I didn’t actually go wine tasting (sadly) but I was thinking about it the whole time.

Details:

Dress: Steal about 4 years ago, I am pretty sure from KOHLS

Jacket: AMERICAN EAGLE. I think throwing a cute jacket like this around your waist when wearing the right dress or a pair of shorts brings such a fun vibe to an outfit

Hat: Picked this up at TARGET while I was out wearing this outfit and it totally brought everything together

Purse: CHANEL

Ta-Da! xo

 

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Simplicity!

Lately, I love the simplicity of outfits.

I paired a basic tank with some denim jeans, a cute necklace and instantly looked put together in under 5 minutes!

What simple pieces are you loving for in your wardrobe for summer?! Leave your comments down below! Xo

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What I’m Wearing:

Tank: American Eagle

Jeans: Norstrom Rack (Brand: Articles of Society)

Necklace & Bracelets: Charming Charlie

 

I Feel ALIVE ♡

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After my meditation this morning, I found myself bawling. But this time, they weren’t tears of sadness. I found myself crying because for the first time, in a long time, I can say that I am genuinely happy. I was crying because I am so proud of how far I’ve come within these past few months.

I was at a very dark place about 3 months ago, a hole I never thought I could dig myself out of.

Not that I’ve been unhappy per se. It’s hard to describe exactly what I’ve been feeling as of late. I’ve just been off..

But this morning, I woke up and just felt so ALIVE. Gosh, I am smiling so hard writing this right now.

It’s just that when you have been in such a dark place, it’s hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel. But today, I see that light.

And I promise, you will too one day. Maybe a month from now, a year, 2 years…we all take time to heal. You can’t rush your healing, but you can take the steps to better yourself everyday. Just please, don’t give up.

Life isn’t easy, and if it were easy, we would never feel that satisfaction of kicking its A$% when we come out on the other side stronger.

It will come back-it being the light which fills your heart, the tranquility which calms your nerves, and the clarity which your mind so dearly needs.

The giddiness, the playfulness, the confidence in being you. It will come back, I know it will.

I was the girl who was so heartbroken, and am now mending the pieces back together.

I was the girl who was once scared, and now I’m becoming fearless.

I was the girl who was at a very dark place, and now I am happier than ever before. Which, I thought I would have never said a few months ago.

It’s important to remember that everything is just a phase. This, like so much else in your life, will come to pass. That is the nature of impermanence. Nothing lasts.

Things are just different today. And I like this kind of different.

I feel change coming on.

Xo!

I Miss You, Even Though You Don’t Deserve To Be Missed.

Even after everything that happened, I still can’t seem to get you out of my head.

I’m okay during the day as long as I keep myself busy, but not at night…that’s a different story.

The second that all of the chaos of my day settles down, and my head hits my pillow, you’re all I see.

It’s been months and I know it shouldn’t be this way. We don’t even talk to each other anymore….but here you are, still living in my thoughts.

Nobody understands how much I miss you. No one even knows. Why would I tell them?

You were awful to me. You broke my heart into a million pieces. They would never get it…I don’t even get myself.

I don’t think about how things ended, though. I think about how we used to be, about who I thought you were.

All the things we used to do together, the road trips we’d take.

I think about how you used to make me laugh so hard I could barely catch my breath, and about our hundreds of inside jokes that no one else could ever comprehend.

For the first time in my life, I felt understood and loved. I was so lucky to have such an amazing connection with someone.

Then, I think about how it was all ripped away from me.

I think about how I’ll never have anything like that again, how I’ll never have you again.

I think about how sad it is that you were such a big part of me and then all of a sudden, one day, you were just gone.

I can’t stop missing you.

Then, I think about how fucking pathetic it is because I know for a fact that you don’t miss me.

I know that I’m chasing my own thoughts in circles, while you’re sound asleep.

I probably never cross your mind.

After all, you were the one who walked away from this. You are the one who caused me to hurt like this.

You were the one who gave up on us. 

And that’s when I realize…I’d rather miss the person I thought you were, than be with someone that is less than what I deserve.

I’d rather just miss you.