After my meditation this morning, I found myself bawling. But this time, they weren’t tears of sadness. I found myself crying because for the first time, in a long time, I can say that I am genuinely happy. I was crying because I am so proud of how far I’ve come within these past few months.
I was at a very dark place about 3 months ago, a hole I never thought I could dig myself out of.
Not that I’ve been unhappy per se. It’s hard to describe exactly what I’ve been feeling as of late. I’ve just been off..
But this morning, I woke up and just felt so ALIVE. Gosh, I am smiling so hard writing this right now.
It’s just that when you have been in such a dark place, it’s hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel. But today, I see that light.
And I promise, you will too one day. Maybe a month from now, a year, 2 years…we all take time to heal. You can’t rush your healing, but you can take the steps to better yourself everyday. Just please, don’t give up.
Life isn’t easy, and if it were easy, we would never feel that satisfaction of kicking its A$% when we come out on the other side stronger.
It will come back-it being the light which fills your heart, the tranquility which calms your nerves, and the clarity which your mind so dearly needs.
The giddiness, the playfulness, the confidence in being you. It will come back, I know it will.
I was the girl who was so heartbroken, and am now mending the pieces back together.
I was the girl who was once scared, and now I’m becoming fearless.
I was the girl who was at a very dark place, and now I am happier than ever before. Which, I thought I would have never said a few months ago.
It’s important to remember that everything is just a phase. This, like so much else in your life, will come to pass. That is the nature of impermanence. Nothing lasts.
Things are just different today. And I like this kind of different.
I feel change coming on.