In the Midst of Life

Life can seem crazy hectic at times. Between finals, work, the busyness of Christmas, I have come to the reality that life really knows how to kick your you know what sometimes. Most of the time. Every day actually.

You might fail a final you’ve studied hours for. Customers at work may take their bad moods out on you. You might feel like a walking zombie most days.

But you are going to be OK.

I could tell you don’t be afraid, but that’s stupid. Be terrified.

Just don’t be afraid about things you should not be afraid of, like what as*#oles think about you. While you’re on this planet, I really recommend just being the weirdest, loudest, most honest you, you can be.

You might as well just love sloppy, and dress crazy, and say outrageous things that don’t hurt people’s feelings because if you hurt people’s feelings, well my friend, then you are the as*#ole I just told you to not fear.

Look, be fabulous and fearless all you want.

Everything is going to be OK.

Things are scary, but they could be worse. Actually, they’re going to get worse. If the Ebola doesn’t get you, the decapitations will. You will fall on the tracks and a train will eat you.

Hell, you might even die in your sleep at 100 years old. Although, in my experience, when you read about how someone died surrounded by loved ones, what’s really happening is that someone died while their loved ones were outside chain smoking.

It’s not like I’m not optimistic.

The future holds wonders and miracles for people who will probably not be born for hundreds of years. Man, it would be great to be a brain suspended inside a giant biomechanical spider. I could probably visit Mars.

But right now, at this moment, things are OK.

Check in tomorrow for an update. Tomorrow, everything might be mega-f’d-up.

Here’s some more truth:

I think you’re doing the best you can do, and your best is pretty great. Don’t give up. Failure is just success with morning breath and bed head.

The most exciting stories are the ones with heroes who don’t think they can go on, but they do.

Sometimes they have friends. I think there’s a law that you can’t quest without three or four trusted companions. I think one of them has to be an archer, and one of them has to be a demolitions expert. Find your Avengers. Conquer fears together. Fight dragons. Make art. Ugh. Make as much art as possible — theater, painting, children, whatever. Anyway, these people are your family.

Never listen to people who say “no worries,” because, yes worries. All the worries. AIDS. ISIS. IRS. What the f*#k do you mean “no worries”? Hey, instead of smiling a serial killer clown smile and saying “no worries,” try just producing a guttural groan and you’ll feel much better. This is the most honest thing anyone can say about life.


Never listen to anyone who doles out “tough love,” because there is no such thing as “tough love.” Love isn’t tough. Love is indestructible. Love is made out of adamantium and star lava. Since love cannot be destroyed, love is gentle. Love is nice.

Everything is going to be OK.

There will be suffering. There will also be these moments when everything works out, and your mom is happy, and you have money in the bank, and you’re doing exactly what you want to be doing, even if it is for a moment.

Then there will probably be more suffering.

But remember that delicious slice of thank you life sandwiched between that old ouch and the current one?

You might get sick. Your dream might not come true. But everything will be OK because, and I’m NOT hitting on you, but you’re freaking good-looking when you’re struggling, fighting, enduring.

Like, your soul is beautiful. The pain will pass. One way or another.




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